THINKING IN THE DARK

THINKING IN THE DARK
April 21, 1993: 9:45 p.m.
Ayala Alabang Village

I was not cursing the darkness for I actually lighted not one but three candles. Darkness was no longer a problem. I could appreciate things around me as I could even read the newspaper.

But the summer heat was so much. I couldn’t stay indoors. So, there I was outside under the screened portion of our premises. How the big mosquitoes made their way through the screen was beyond my comprehension. They were feasting all around my legs and I was itching all over.

I could tolerate all the side effects of this blackout menace as I tolerated worse experiences during the Japanese occupation.

The neighbor’s generators were emitting rickety noises yet, it was seemingly quiet around the house. My youngest son was sleeping deeply. My eldest, was not yet home. My wife and three daughters were in the United States of America, and must be enjoying the amenities of the land of milk and honey.

I was alone and wondering why. But, I mustn’t wonder. This is the reality of life. Sooner or later I would be retiring after having attended to patients for more than thirty years. I have plans for my retirement and what I am experiencing is a good rehearsal.

When the time comes that all my children are already living their own lives with their own families, my wife and I, much older than we are now, shall be left behind to take care of ourselves.

Knowing my wife, she won’t run out of things to do. She won’t stop working nor stop earning, for those are the things that make her happy. She always needs a lot of adrenalin in her circulation to feel good.

Me, I shall organize a senior citizen’s group but not just the usual bunch of aging pensioners, meeting every now and then to share their life’s discomforts. My group shall be active in all aspects of life, physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually.

We shall merge ourselves with the youth organizations to serve as their partners in socio-civic activities. We shall be their moral and financial supporters as well as counselors and advisers in the promotion of their chosen projects.

While the youth shall be our strength and dynamic planners, we, the senior citizens shall be their sources of inspiration by sharing with them our wisdom and experiences.

It has not been tried anywhere before but with the clear perception that I now see vividly through flickering candles and beyond the darkness of the night I can I can see tangible results that could greatly improve our community.

This shall become a seed that shall be planted in the soil of my hometown. When it generates and grows we shall not be selfish. We shall be willing to share the concept with other communities until the whole nation harvest plenty of fruits.

Back to the flickering candles and the reason why I lighted them, the blackout is teaching me many lessons. It is only in the dark nights that I can truly appreciate the brightness of the stars. It also brings the memories of fireflies, oh, millions of them hovering over a big mango tree behind our house back in the province when I was a little boy.

Here in Ayala Alabang Village there are many trees but there are no fireflies even when it is dark. I wonder where they have all gone since the electric lights became popular. I wonder how many children today missed the joys and challenges of catching fireflies, gathering them inside a glass jar then passing them around like hundreds of tiny flashlights.

Without a dark tunnel there is no promise of light shining at its end. Without the blackness of the night who will ever notice the brightness and colors of a beautiful day? Black (dark) is important because it makes everything else more beautiful.

Welcome blackout and thank you NAPOCOR for mismanagement. I won’t be hysterical anymore. Let us all accept the realities of nights in our lives.